Paper Flowers
by Lylyrice
Summary: It's senior year and hey, things get crazy, what can you do? Things only get harder during these times; especially Jean Kirschstein. He believes he has everything under control until he begins having his best friend Marco over. Much like he used to in earlier years. Would an indirect kiss affect this much? Who ever knew that things could ever get so misunderstood? Jeanmarco angst
1. Chrysanthemums

Flowers

One could view at the hours

Representing both elegance and grace

Whilst remaining in their place

Their beauty peerless on the battlefield

However, one must yield

Not to disrupt their beauty

By using them as a mockery

Jean only scoffed at the blatantly horrible poem. Normally, he wouldn't read such poetic injustice, however, his English teacher had much different tastes. Mr. Smith tended to really enjoy those flowery, almost girly, sounding poetry. Whilst Jean was everything but interested in this class.

In fact, the only reason why Jean decided to take literature class was because of his friend, Marco. Almost as flowery as the poetry Jean hated so much, Marco was too. Always bright and positive, never having anything bad to say about anyone, pretty much the polar opposite of Jean.

Jean would only give a cheeky smirk as he would think of him; as he was doing right now. He normally drew a quick glance at Marco and try his best to decipher the expression on his face. Normally noting the fact that Marco liked to work diligently and jot down note even when they weren't necessary. A model student.

His expression was the same as always, just the way Jean liked it. Or in more specific terms.. how he liked Marco. In fact, Jean had very conflicted and indecisive thoughts on Marco. He didn't know how to feel about this since in his mind, he was believed to be an ordinary high school student: straight as an arrow. However, he started to gain weird feelings towards Marco after having him sleep over a few nights. And no, nothing special happened on those dates. They just- hung out. Like normal best friends do. They would stay up until 3, play video games, Marco having to listen to Jean ramble on about girls that he liked, etc. This went on for about 2 years before he started coming to terms with himself.

In fact, they were scheduled to have a sleepover that very night: right after this very class was over. Still, as a senior, it was hard for him to face himself—let alone Marco. In reality, Jean was both excited and dreadful for when the bell would ring. One part was telling him not to give into the pressure and just come out to everybody that he had feelings for Marco-and exclusively him.

Jean seemed cool on the outside during class time but was panicking when he had time to think to himself. Only a few minutes had passed since the aforementioned scoff over the flowery poetry was made and Jean was now dreading the next few minutes to pass. 5 minutes remained of the otherwise boring and dreaded class. And for once in his lifetime, Jean wasn't excited of the fact that the next minutes following class would be the start for his weekend. If it weren't for Marco, that is.. If it weren't for Marco, Jean wouldn't be so reluctant of getting out of his seat and having to face himself and use Marco as a mirror. If it weren't—

 _Ring._

Once. Once it rang. Until it sounded yet another time.

Ring

"Fuck" was the only thing that came through Jean's lips upon hearing the second bell. Now out of time to compose himself, he slowly rose from his seat and turned his head to meet eyes with the ones he didn't want to meet.

Exuberant and full of life, just like the person those pair of eyes belonged to: none other than Marco Bodt himself. He was lean and tall (having lost weight from his previous years), tanned skin which was complimented by the millions of freckles adorning his body. And God was his laugh cute. Which was in fact, Jean's favorite feature of him next to his smile.

Marco was the type of person who always kept to himself; someone who wasn't as reckless as Jean was. Secluded. But welcoming if he liked you. He was patient and endearing- however he does endure a lot (thanks to Jean, of course). Jean would normally hear in the hallways, "Have you heard of that Marco Bodt kid? I have him in my class and I can tell already that he has the world going for him. It'd be a shame if anything ever influenced him negatively." The sad part is, is that he hears this from both teachers and students. However, he knew exactly who most people were hinting at whenever they said 'an influence.'

It was him. Jean Kirschstein. 17, wild cart, reckless, and daringly handsome. You see, he himself had quite a reputation at school as well. Of course, being a teenager, he had dated around and admittedly slept around in his days. Thank god for him being a boy, most would think. He was often referred to as 'The boy who makes the good girls turn bad'. Admittedly, he was an awkward puddle of pudge in his middle school years, but as they say; Summer changes quite a lot. His freshman, sophomore, and good into his junior year, he changed dramatically. All except for one thing: Marco. It wasn't until the summer prior to his senior year that he started coming to terms about his feelings with Marco. Much like what was previously stated about the sleepovers those two would have: which brings us back to the dilemma at hand.

Marco only made his way over to Jean as his smile remained plastered on his face.

"Jean!" the freckled boy called. His lips curved into a cute, wide smile.

"Hey, Marcssss" Jean trailed as he felt his anxiety rising at the sight of his friend. Still shook up from his previous thoughts, he tried his best to play it cool.

"So, we're walking over to your place?" Marco began as he slipped his binder into his messenger bag.

"Of course. Maman's still at work so we have some time to yell 'fuck' and 'shit' without being scolded"

"You mean _you_ being scolded." Marco chuckled as he began to make his way to the door with Jean in tow.

Honestly, Jean wasn't paying attention to the walk home. So whenever Marco would start up a conversation, Jean would only pretend to be interested and only reply with "mhm"'s and "ok"'s. In fact, Jean was more worried about what they would do once they arrived at his house. Which was much sooner than Jean expected: much to his dismay.

"Jean? You got keys?"

"Yeah. Give me a sec.."

 _Click._

"MAMANNNNNNN?!" Jean called as he opened the door

"Vous êtes ici, vous vieille dame? (are you here, you old lady?)"

Marco only chuckled at Jean.

"Oh, right. Please excuse my French. You nerd." Jean said as he rolled his eyes, knowing that Marco loved using that joke whenever he spoke to his parents in front of Marco.

Without hearing a response Jean only shrugged and decided to yell multiple cuss words throughout the house, including many in French.

"Jean! I was wondering if you can help me with my French? I have some phrases here I'm not too sure about.."

"Oh yeah. Meet me in my room. I'll go get us some snacks." Jean called back as he rummaged through the fridge before finally selecting two Arizona iced tea cans and a bag of BBQ chips. Making his way upstairs, he decided to take some deep breaths before facing his friend.

Upon entering his room, he noticed Marco observing the contents of his bookshelf. Hearing his friend enter, Marco only smiled as he turned his head to face Jean.

"I find it cute how you kept all of the paper flowers I made you when you were sad."

"Yeah, well.. They helped me. To think that someone would go out of their way to make these tedious little flowers just to make me feel better."

Marco only blushed at the indirect compliment.

"I used to always make you chrysanthemums, huh?"

"Yeah! Those used to be my favorite flowers. And I had no idea why."

"Well, there were two reasons why I specifically made you chrysanthemums. One because, obviously, they were your favorite. And two, because chrysanthemums signify support within a friendship so I thought that was perfect.. But they were so hard to make..!"

Marco laughed as he sat back down on Jean's computer chair.

"So, what were the words you wanted me to look over with you?" Jean began as he sat down on his bed.

"Well, I know what they mean but I don't know how to pronounce them," Marco sighed as he drew a paper from his very organized binder before handing it to Jean.

Jean only looked at them and motioned Marco to sit down next to him on the bed; which Marco obediently complied to.

"Alright. Repeat after me."

He said as he began to read the words that were listed on the paper, with Marco repeating them without a single hitch in his speech.

"Y'know, I always found it kinda odd how you could just.. speak French."

"Why? You've met my mom before. Such a fresh off the boat French hag."

"I just wonder.. why DO you speak French even if you don't like to?"

"Because of the hag." Both friends began to chuckle amongst themselves.

Random conversations began to arise and spring up out of nowhere until both seemed to lose track of time.

Everything would seem completely normal until the clock stroke 8.


	2. Yellow and Orangce Roses

A/N: Hey guys! Welcome to Chapter 2 of Paper Flowers! i'm planning on updating about every 2-3 days just so you guys know ^^ I hope you guys enjoy! Suggestions on what should happen next? Let me know! And now, the story commences!

8 o'clock struck the clocks in the house like a flash of lightning. It had been hours since the two had been talking and laughing among each other. Jean, relieved of the fact that there were no visible awkward tensions between the two, decided to take a break from the laughs to call his mother who was still no where in sight.

"Hold on, Bodt- butt. I need to call maman to make sure she'll be coming home soon."

"Where is your mom, anyways?"

"She went to go visit her sister back in Nice."

"The city in France? Why didn't she take you?"

"She apparently wanted to see if I could be a responsible adult for a few days. She said she'd be back today though.." Jean finished as he took out his phone and began dialing in his mom's number.

Ring.

"Bonjour? Maman?"

"Jeanbo! Je suis désolé. Mon vol a été retardé à lundi. Il n'y a rien que je puisse faire." ( Jeanbo! I'm sorry. My flight got delayed until Monday. There's nothing I can do right now.)"

A few more heated words in French escaped Jean's lips before he finally muttered a-

"OK Maman. Je dois y aller. je t'aime " (Ok, mom. I have to go. I love you) before finally hanging up and sighing.

"What's up?" Marco asked as he looked over at Jean.

"Mom told me that he flight got delayed and won't be able to come here until Monday."

"I thought you would be excited over that?"

"No, Marco. She's been gone for 3 days and I can't hold out for another 2."

"I knew it."

"What?"

"You're still a mama's boy." Marco laughed as he only saw Jean smile for the smallest of seconds.

"I could put on some Green Day if it'll make you feel better?" Marco said softly before turning his phone on and awaiting a response.

"That'll be good.. thanks Marcs." Jean replied as he sat back down on the bed and proceeded to lay down.

For a while both sat in silence with Basket Case playing in the background.

"It feels like we're in one of those movies.." Marco finally said as he looked over at Jean, who now had his eyes closed and his head reclined on the palms of his hands.

"In what way?" he asked as he slowly opened his eyes.

"Like.. we have music playing in the background. And the protagonist is trying to think of what to do next since their mom will be gone for the weekend."

"You mean like those stupid teenage movies that have the main character being a nerd and ends up trying to throw this big ass party to be accepted and ends up losing their virginity to like.. 5 different chicks?"

"Yeah! Exactly like those!"

"Oh lordy. I had an ex-girlfriend who would make me watch those bullshit movies with her all of the time. I hope you don't make me do that shit all over again."

Marco only stared back with a 'what just happened' face and replied with only a

"Yeah, sure."

"But, a movie does sound good right now. Do you have any good suggestions?"

"I don't know. I just finished reading Perks of Being a Wallflower. You want to have 90's war flashbacks..?"

"Sounds good. Go find it on the internets and I'll blow it up on the big TV."

Silence. Awkward silence filled the room as the movie was searched for, watched, and eventually ended.

Both parties now reeling awkwardly in their seats next to each other. Jean, desperately trying to make conversation asked one of the most blatantly obvious questions one could ever ask a bookish type.

"What do you think was better? The book or the movie?"

"The book, obviously."

"I don't know the format just wasn't for me like c'mon.. Letters? It took me like.. 20 of them to realize that Charlie was a dude and not some chick." Jean scoffed. Marco only laughed at the comical response and leaned his weight onto his elbows.

"The whole thing with Patrick was weird though." Marco whispered.

"What? With the whole kiss thing?"

"Yeah. I thought that was messed up.. I saw it as if he was trying to use Charlie to get over his obvious heartache over Brad."

"You mean like, the gay shit?"

"Yeah.. the gay stuff."

"Haha. Wouldn't that be weird if that were us." Jean blurted out awkwardly. This caused Marco to blush.

"What do you mean?" the freckled boy spoke up.

"I mean, say you were gay and whenever a girl broke up with me, you would come over and try to make me feel better but we end up fooling around."

"I-isn't that what I've been doing? Minus the fooling around?"

"Sure, sure." Now charged with adrenaline and a shot of confidence, Jean finally stated.

"You can give me something other than paper flowers, you know."


	3. Water Lilies

"What..?" Marco sputtered as he slowly leaned backwards, away from Jean.

"Haha just kidding. I wouldn't trade paper chrysanthemums for anything else in the world." Jean finally spat out, his heartbeat now slowing down from the past adrenaline rush. Marco, now sporting an almost disappointed look, just stared back at Jean.

"Oh.. Well, I'm glad you like them.." he said quietly.

Jean only drew a glance at Marco's face, scanning to decipher the expression on his face. He looked confused and disappointed, almost looking depressed in a way. Marco was no longer drawn backwards and away from Jean but instead, scooted a bit closer.

"Do you really mean it? That you wouldn't trade the flowers for anything in the world?" Marco finally spoke.

"Of course I mean it. Why would I lie about something like that?"

"No no, I just meant to ask if you really value our friendship as much as you lead on. I mean, it was years ago when I made you those and I honestly expected you to have lost them or crumpled them up by now. But surprisingly, they're still intact in the same state in which I had given them to you."

"What made you think that?" Jean responded, as he leaned his elbows over his knees.

"It's just.. Please don't take any offense to this. But I've seen the many people you've dumped in your life. And I'm just scared that you thought of me the same way.. That I was expendable." Marco's mood seemed to shift as he stated the final part of his statement.

"The only people I've really thrown away were acquaintances and.." Jean paused before his major epiphany.

"Girlfriends." He finished, noticing Marco's head bob into a slight nod; which seemed like the nod was done with shame.

"Marco, why would you even worry about that? You're my best friend."

"Y-yeah. I guess you're right.." Marco sighed, now sporting a reassured smile on his face.

"Thanks, Jean. I'm glad I'm your friend."

"Yeah, Marco. Me too."

And with that being said, both boys had no idea how much that statement would hurt so much in the end.

Moving on from that, both boys began talking over other subjects before deciding to scramble over another movie to watch. Both deciding that a horror film would do a great justice to their entertainment cravings.

Jean's room was now littered with soda cans and chip bags as the two watched the movie in an awkward silence. Again, watching the movie to the end with nothing much to say, they began to clean up all the littered goods on the floor.

"So, Marco?" Jean called out as he threw his soda can into a nearby trashcan.

"Mhm?"

"Do YOU think I value our friendship? You just seemed so unsure and insecure about how I felt about this friendship."

"To be honest, I didn't at first. I was scared that you thought that I was expendable."

"Why?"

"You asked me this earlier."

"Still, I just need to know exactly why you think you're expendable."

"Well, like we discussed before; there are two types of people in which you categorize as expendable. Acquaintances and girlfriends.."

"What's the problem then? You're not in those categories."

"I-I just.." Marco stumbled before stepping closer to his friend.

"I want to be one thing but I'm always another to you."

"Marco?"

"I-I mean." He started again as he looked down.

"I want to be your best friend but I feel like you just see me as an acquaintance now." Marco lied. His heart rate now building.

"Oh, why didn't you just say so then..?" Jean said, his heart now dropping at the sound of Marco's emotions.

"I-I just didn't want to make you feel awkward or that you're a bad person. You're really good to me and I always found that uncharacteristic of you- You know-! A heartbreaker who gets bored easily and just-" Marco began to lose his point.

Jean began to catch on to what Marco was hinting at.

"Are you lying to me?"

"I-.."

"Marco. Just be upfront. What's the problem? Do you feel like I tease you too much? Do I blow you off too much? I mean, just tell me."

"I.. I'm confused about you."


End file.
